Read my story..and tell me what you think?

You have a cute plot going there, but you should probably switch the format around a bit. For instance, make sure to stay in the same tense throughout the whole story. Is Kelsey telling the story as it is happening or how it happened? It was a little wobbly...I would also use some transitions between your chapters. The story doesn't flow. It is also easier to read when you put quotations around the spoken dialogue. Just to remind you, when a new person/character speaks you need to skip down anotherl line. It will be much easier to understand, and you will not have to say, "I said" and, "he said". Try to find other words besides "said", such as:exclaimed, yelled, whispered, stated, questioned, ect. Here is an example...The coach strolled around to where I was tumbling and cheerfully exclaimed, "Nice tumbling there, girl. What was your name again?" So, your only issues are tenses, flowing, and grammar. Fix those, and you will have a creative, steady, and wonderful story! Post it again once you fix it. I would love to read it! Best of luck, friend!