I'm confused about .?

Ok so I was raised Christian, and I still am one. Just recently however I've been getting the urge for ! I want it and I know I don't want to marry too early. The thing is I was raised not to until I'm married! I feel so confused because I want it and I don't think God would make something so pleasurable if he didn't want us to enjoy it right? Also the thing that pissed me off in my family is that they feel that virginity is what gives a woman worth. In other words once you have you're a slutty, disgusting, no good worthless ! Isn't it crazy!? My brother is 17 and he wants to stay a virgin till marriage which I think is great! I used to want that, until I turned 19. I'm going to be 20 and I just feel like I'm missing out. What should I do? I don't want to spend the rest of my life thinking I'm worhtless for having . My family tells me that if I have and don't end up with him what am I going to offer my future husband? I just feel trapped. I want something but my family and religion tell me not to! For any women who have had , do you feel nasty or worthless? Any suggestions, thanks!